How do you feel post-workout?

What is one moment in class today that you feel really confident about?

I have started to ask this question at the end of my classes to help my clients self-reflect. Surprisingly, very few are able to answer this question without really having to think hard. Typically, they are all quick to complain or tell me something that was hard instead. It saddens me to think that all we can see are our missteps, our failures, or our shortcomings, and forget about all of the amazing, positive things about ourselves.

Earlier this week, I reminded my clients that this question goes beyond the room and into our real lives. When we look in the mirror, we are quick to judge or feel self-conscious instead of owning who we are and how we look. I have been doing my own self-reflection lately and reading a lot into body image and confidence and there are so many factors that can contribute to these feelings. My hope is that we can start to unpack these feelings and understand their origin. From there we can create a plan to help combat these negative feelings and start to feel confident about ourselves.

Why do we feel this way?

Society. We are constantly being told smaller, thinner, blonder, whiter, is better. Yes, there are some amazing campaigns and various brands who are embracing real people as they are, but we have so much work to be done. This doesn’t just happen overnight. Even though there are positive campaigns going on, it takes much more than a day to retrain our feelings towards ourselves. 

Self-talk. I had a high school teacher always tell me, whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. When we think we look a certain way or believe we hold a certain amount of value, we end up believing that all to be true even when in fact it usually is not. We need to begin to speak to ourselves more positively. Think about how you would speak to your own friend and boost them up? Why not talk to yourself the same way?

Comparison. Anyone ever heard the saying; comparison is the thief of joy? Or, the grass is always greener on the other side? When we compare ourselves to what others have got going on, we not only discount ourselves and what we are worth, but we also try to live up to an unrealistic expectation to become something we never will be. Everyone is unique and we have to own it.

I know this is all easier said than done. Each day is a new experience with our own body and it is not always going to be a healthy, positive one. But, when we can recognize where these thoughts and ideas come from, we can begin to stop those negative thoughts, replace them with positive ones, and combat this world that is constantly trying to tell us we aren’t good enough. 

Yours in self-discovery,

Rachel