Let's talk body positivity

Body Positivity. I feel like this phrase has become a buzzword at the forefront of the self-love movement. Today I wanted to talk about it and some other terms and phrases we use, sometimes interchangeably, to help everyone become better aware of the terms we use in a seemingly positive and good-natured way. Now before I dive any deeper, I want to acknowledge the privilege I carry in the fitness space, being a cis-gendered, thin, fit, young, white woman. This bias and privilege is the reason I have written this idea down yet failed to share anything on my blog for weeks, for fear of getting it wrong. As much as I want today’s conversation to be informative and have others better understand the usage of body positivity and other phrases, I don’t claim to be an expert, and recognize I too have a lot to learn. I would love for this conversation to continue far beyond this blog with all of you.

What is body positivity?

When I asked this question on an IG story recently, most people gave me a similar answer to the following thoughts. The gist of the phrase was centred around loving your body, being comfortable in your own skin, and having confidence in what your body can do. Only one person  (admitting that she had only learned this 6 months ago herself), added in the most important piece - a movement created by and for fat, black women. The idea is to help normalize larger, black bodies that typically do not get shown in the traditional media space. Did you know that?

I did not always know this. This is not an opportunity to point fingers at those using it, but a time to stop and reflect on the vocabulary we use and where it actually originated from. When I see people using the phrase, I stop and think that we could actually begin to share other concepts like body-neutrality, self-love, and self-compassion instead.

I have done some of my own studying and learning on this subject and learned about the origin of body positivity a few years ago when it began becoming more of a buzzword on social media. I have learned that I am not really the proper representation of the person who should be using the hashtag. Sadly, thin white women, who I truly think believe they are doing a positive thing in the world, are discussing body positivity when it is actually an inappropriate use of the term.

What can we do?

As a a person of influence, which really is all of us in one capacity or another when sharing on social media, can become more educated on the topic and begin to use more appropriate terms and hashtags. If thin white people are the only faces that come up when searching this hashtag, we are doing a disservice to those around us that need the support to normalize all bodies and to bring awareness to the fact that all bodies deserve to be equally celebrated and treated with respect. Thin, white bodies show up everywhere, so this hashtag should be reserved for those who do not always see themselves in the media.

We can also begin to become familiar with some of the terms below. The following definitions are my interpretation and how I myself understand them to be.

Body neutrality - the ability to see your body in a neutral way, rather than negative, on days when you struggle to find the love for yourself. This may mean appreciating your body for what it can do and not tying your worth to your physical being. For example, my body is capable of standing for hours and I can appreciate that as it allows me to work my retail job for 8 hours at a time.

Self-love - when you can truly appreciate and have a positive feeling toward yourself, whether it be about a physical, mental, or emotional attribute. However, note that you can still love your body where it is at and yet still aspire to seek change.

Self-compassion - having compassion towards oneself despite experiencing a setback, failure, or shortcoming. Appreciating where you are at and knowing that it is okay.

Blog Post September 6th 2020

How do we actually do that?

We do not all magically wake up each day and love every single thing about ourselves. It also is totally fine to still aspire to change. Self-love does not mean you have to settle. However, remember that when seeking change, if we can do it from a positive more loving mindset, the change we are seeking whether that be physical, mental, emotional or other, can happen in a more positive, healthy way. 

Body neutrality is key. We must start there. Then every day, make a mental or physical note of one physical trait and one mental/emotional trait that you love about yourself. It can be as simple as your smile and your work ethic. Hopefully, each day, the love grows more genuine and easier to identify.

This conversation is the tip of the iceberg and one that I hope to continue to share about in the future whether that be on my own blogs, and social channels, or the sharing of others who are educated and much more experienced in the space. Something I am continuing to do is to diversify my newsfeed to help gain perspective and give me variety in the thoughts, experiences, and appearances of those around me.

All bodies are unique, and no two bodies look alike. Things are changing, but we must continue to seek ALL body types with our media channels, especially those of marginalized and underrepresented, because they matter. This is an opportunity for all of us to learn and continue to do better.

Yours in self-discovery,

Rachel

Rachel Fackoury